That guilt makes sense, and I want to gently set it down for a moment. Naming emotional immaturity isn’t about blame. It’s about understanding your own experience so you can move through the world with more freedom.

What emotional immaturity can look like

Emotionally immature parents are often loving people who simply didn’t have the emotional tools their children needed, frequently because no one gave those tools to them. As children, they may not have received the attunement, safety, or modeling that helps a person grow comfortable with big feelings.

In adulthood, that can show up as a parent who:

• Struggles to stay present during emotional conversations, or changes the subject
• Responds to your feelings with defensiveness, guilt, or their own distress
• Relies on you for reassurance, taking on a more childlike role
• Keeps connection at the surface, avoiding depth or repair after conflict
• Sees disagreement as rejection rather than a normal part of closeness

None of these make a parent a bad person. They’re signs of unmet needs passed quietly down the generations.

How it can affect you as an adult

Children are wonderfully adaptive. If a parent couldn’t hold your emotions, you may have learned to hold everyone’s but your own. Later in life, that can look like over-responsibility, difficulty trusting your own needs, anxiety in close relationships, or a lingering sense that you must earn love by being easy.

Recognizing these patterns is not a verdict on your family. It’s the beginning of self-compassion.

What helps

Healing rarely requires cutting anyone off. More often, it’s about growing a steadier relationship with yourself so your relationships with others can soften.

Therapy can help you understand the patterns you grew up inside, grieve what you needed and didn’t receive, and build the emotional skills that weren’t modeled for you. It can also help you set warm, clear boundaries, ones that protect your peace while still leaving room for love. Many people find they can stay connected to their parents and stop carrying more than their share.

As a licensed marriage and family therapist, I’ve spent my career helping families understand one another with more compassion, including the ways love can be real even when it wasn’t expressed perfectly. You don’t have to choose between honoring your parents and honoring yourself.

If any of this resonates, you’re not alone, and support is available. I’d be glad to talk with you about where you are and where you’d like to go.

Therapy available for Individuals, Couples, Families, and Groups. Now seeing individuals and families based in NY, NJ, TX, CA, FL, GA, IL and VT. International (Japan, United Arab Emirates) on case by case basis. Reach out to schedule a consultation whenever you’re ready.

The most common reasons for family estrangement are:

• Extreme negativity
• Emotional disconnect
• Mental illness
• Fundamental worldview disagreements (there has been a rise in political family estrangement)
• Destructive behavior
• Abuse

These deep rooted issues may result in family members pursuing no-contact, effectively cutting their family off. 

So, why is family estrangement on the rise? 

As many as 1 in 4 Americans today report experiencing some form of family estrangement. Some contributing factors to why familial estrangement appears to be on the rise may include increased awareness of mental health issues, shifting societal standards around family, and more.

As social media becomes increasingly prevalent in peoples day-to-day lives, younger generations are working to decrease the stigma that surrounds discussions of mental health. A byproduct of this for many young adults has been the realization or recognition of unhealthy patterns they may be complicit in, or that they experience at the hands of family members.

This wide access to mental health knowledge, and the popularization of protecting one’s mental health may be contributing factors to family estrangement as an act of attempting to reduce trauma or negative mental health triggers. 

Another potential factor that may have a correlation with rising rates of family estrangement is political disagreements among family members. Whether it be heated discussion around the Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner table, or even just day to day discussions, American families have been experiencing increased political polarization manifesting itself in family settings. This is especially true for young adults (think Generation Z and even Millennials) and their parents.

Whether it be family members struggling with mental health, abusive cycles, trauma, or even political divides that feel insurmountable, familial estrangement can be emotionally troubling for all parties involved.

So, what are some ways that you can cope with family estrangement?

Whether you were the one who initiated family estrangement, or whether you feel shut out by a loved one, it is important to acknowledge that family estrangement involves various people.

It may be helpful to seek out individual therapy to work through your feelings around your experience with family estrangement. Facing this difficult topic in a safe individual therapy session may help you identify the root of the estrangement, and the path that is most beneficial for healing moving forward. 

If after self care and emotional healing you feel more able to confront the topic of your family estrangement, it might be time to acknowledge that estrangement doesn’t need to be permanent.

If you feel as though you are ready to take part in mending family relationships, and your family is willing to participate as well, family therapy may be a good option for you and your loved ones.

Here at Lisa Rogers Counseling we can help you and your family sit down together and have safe, productive, and honest conversations that seek to get at the root of your estrangement. No one family member needs to feel responsible for facilitating the hard conversations that this task calls for. Location, facilitation, and any other barriers can be easily remedied with our practice.

As a therapist who is licensed in several states, and has years of experience, Lisa Rogers is here to help. Lisa offers family counseling over video calls that is often helpful for family members who are separated by distance. Calm, collected, and insightful moderation for families struggling with estrangement is available and can serve to strengthen and repair relationships between loved ones.

But how do you know if you’re family is ready for therapy together? The families that are ready to embrace the guidelines listed below are more likely to have a successful family therapy experience. Keep in mind that a therapy session is a short time to work through significant issues with multiple people present and you want to be prepared to make the most of your time together.

Be Willing to Establish Clear Goals Together

Before embarking on your family therapy journey, it’s important to take some time to identify your goals, individually and as a family. Goals don’t have to be perfectly refined early on, but it’s important to establish the direction you’re headed. What specific issues do you hope to address? What changes would you like to see in your family dynamics? Establishing clear goals will provide focus during therapy sessions, helping you track progress and stay motivated.

All Family Members Will Show up Prepared

Demonstrate Commitment with Open Communication

Effective communication is what all successful family therapy is built on. Set the precedent that every family member is free to express their thoughts, feelings, and concerns openly and honestly, without fear of judgment or dismissal. Active listening and empathy are your family’s best friend for increased understanding of each others perspectives and experiences.

Be Open to Change

Family therapy often involves exploring entrenched patterns of behavior and challenging longstanding beliefs and assumptions. Staying open-minded and receptive to new insights and perspectives that emerge during therapy is important. Remember that change is a gradual process, and be patient with yourself and your family members as you navigate through it together.

Respect Your Family Members Boundaries

Respecting each other’s boundaries is crucial for creating a safe and supportive therapeutic environment. Be mindful of personal space, emotional boundaries, and confidentiality within the family. Avoid making assumptions or imposing your own expectations on others, and instead, strive to cultivate mutual respect and understanding.

Practice Patience and Compassion

Family therapy can evoke intense emotions and trigger difficult conversations. Practice patience and compassion towards yourself and your family members as you navigate through these challenges together. Validate each other’s feelings and experiences, even if you don’t always agree, and refrain from criticizing or blaming one another.

Be Willing to Compromise

Compromise is key for resolving conflicts and finding mutually acceptable solutions within the family. Be ready to negotiate and make concessions when necessary, keeping the best interests of the family in mind. Your family’s willingness to practice collaborative problem-solving will go a long way in creating new family patterns.

Be Ready Celebrate Progress

Celebrate the progress you make as a family, no matter how small or incremental it may seem. By acknowledging your achievements along the way, you and your family members will be motivated to keep moving forward.

Virtual counseling is a wonderful, convenient option for multi-generational families with busy schedules or who are dispersed across state lines. Each member of the group must be a resident of a state that Lisa Rogers Counseling is licensed in. Contact Lisa Rogers today.

Life can put our mental health and relationships to the test. There are times when relational difficulties feel insurmountable and utterly overwhelming. We end up anxious, fearful and unclear about how to move forward. This is where a LMFT can help.

Picture a LMFT as a skilled navigator helping you sail through stormy waters. LMFT’s are licensed and trained to assist individuals, couples, and families in addressing a wide spectrum of issues affecting their mental health and relationships. They help bring clarity through complex relational dynamics.

An LMFT creates a safe and nonjudgmental space for you to express thoughts and emotions. Whether you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or facing difficulties in your relationships, they offer a listening ear without passing any judgment. This safe environment allows you to explore your emotions and experiences freely.

For individuals grappling with personal challenges, an LMFT can help unpack the underlying causes and develop coping strategies. They utilize various therapeutic techniques tailored to your needs, fostering self-awareness and assisting you in building resilience.

When it comes to relationships, LMFTs specialize in guiding couples and families through tough times. They facilitate open communication, helping partners and family members understand each other better. Through therapy sessions, they assist in resolving conflicts, rebuilding trust, and nurturing healthier relationships. Their aim is not to take sides but to foster understanding and create a supportive atmosphere where conflicts can be addressed constructively.

An LMFT isn’t just there to help during crises either; they also focus on prevention and maintenance. They provide tools and techniques that can enhance communication skills, strengthen relationships, and improve overall mental health, acting as proactive guides in your journey towards well-being.

LMFT’s are equipped with extensive training in various therapeutic approaches. Some mainstream approaches that Lisa Rogers is trained in include, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), Psychodynamic Therapy, and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. These approaches are then applied in a way that suits your unique circumstances.

It’s important to note that seeking help from an LMFT doesn’t imply weakness. In fact, it takes courage and strength to recognize when support is needed and to take steps towards positive change. You’ve likely consulted with a doctor for physical ailments and consulting a therapist for mental health concerns is a similar proactive step towards self-care.

Perhaps right now you’re facing problematic relational dynamics or other emotional challenges an LMFT can be your ally in the midst of turbulent circumstances. They offer guidance, support, and expertise, helping you navigate life’s complexities with resilience and understanding.

Lisa Rogers is an LMFT licensed in multiple states that can help you embark on a path toward healthy relationships. Lisa can work with groups across state lines via convenient online therapy tools. It’s never been easier to embrace the opportunity to invest in your mental health and relationships.

As a therapist who works with adult siblings in a variety of contexts, these are the underlying factors that often lead to difficulties in relationships.

History! – Childhood Dynamics and Roles

Childhood experiences play a pivotal role in shaping adult sibling relationships. The roles siblings assume during their formative years can carry over into adulthood and influence how they interact. For instance, a sibling who was the “caretaker” might feel burdened by this role in later life, while the “rebellious” sibling might struggle with issues of autonomy and identity.

Unresolved conflicts from childhood, such as competition for parental attention or perceived favoritism, can continue to manifest as adults struggle to redefine their roles within the family.

Communication Styles and Patterns

Effective communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and adult sibling relationships are no exception. Divergent communication styles can lead to misunderstandings, misinterpretations, and unresolved conflicts.

Some siblings might struggle to express their emotions openly, leading to pent-up frustrations. Others might use passive-aggressive behavior or avoidance to cope with difficult conversations. Identifying and addressing these communication patterns can pave the way for more meaningful interactions.

Life Changes and Transitions

People grow and change over a lifetime. Life’s many transitions—marriage, parenthood, worldview changes, and relocations—can impact adult sibling relationships. These changes can lead to shifts in lifestyles, priorities, and values, sometimes causing siblings to grow apart.

Conflicts can arise when one sibling perceives that the other is making choices they don’t agree with. Acknowledging the impact of these life changes and finding ways to adapt can be crucial for preserving the bond between adult siblings.

Unresolved Resentments and Jealousy

Resentments and jealousy can fester within sibling relationships for years, often stemming from perceived inequalities or unaddressed grievances. These feelings can be magnified when siblings compare their achievements, lifestyles, or relationships. A therapist can help you explore and address these underlying emotions can open the door to healing and reconciliation.

Parental Influences

Parental dynamics can also cast a long shadow over adult sibling relationships. Perceptions of parental favoritism or differing parenting styles can lead to feelings of resentment or rivalry. In cases where parents are aging or facing health issues, disagreements about caregiving responsibilities can further strain relationships. Encouraging open conversations about these parental influences can promote understanding and empathy among siblings.

Need help?

A therapist like Lisa Rogers can help you and your adult siblings understand the factors that contribute to issues within your relationship. By addressing these underlying causes, you can work towards building more fulfilling and harmonious relationships with your adult siblings, enhancing your overall emotional well-being.

Looking for a therapist licensed in multiple states for your family or sibling relationship? Lisa Rogers is a licensed therapist for the following state: NY, NJ, TX, CA, FL, GA, IL, VT. Contact Lisa Rogers for more information.

Perhaps your ability to connect, communicate and generally relate with your parents, adult children or siblings has become difficult. Family estrangement can be difficult to deal with in even the best situations.

Online Therapy is an excellent resource to help resolve Family Estrangement

If you’re seeking to reconnect with a family member and potentially heal a significant relationship in your life, utilizing teletherapy (provided by a skilled counselor) could be just what your family needs.

Teletherapy (i.e, virtual therapy or online therapy), offers a convenient and accessible way for adult family members such as siblings and their parents to connect. A skilled online therapist can help family members address their emotional challenges, bridge gaps, and rebuild meaningful connections. Lisa Rogers is a seasoned online therapist offering counseling for those in select states.

Online Therapy can overcome geographic barriers

Often, adult siblings find themselves separated by great distances, making it difficult to engage in regular face-to-face meetings. Teletherapy erases these boundaries, allowing siblings to participate in therapy sessions from the comfort of their own homes, regardless of their physical location.

Through video calls and secure online platforms, they can engage in therapeutic discussions, share experiences, and work towards resolving conflicts that may have kept them apart.

Families can explore open and honest communication

Years of unresolved issues and miscommunication can create a rift between adult siblings themselves as well as with their parents. Virtual therapy provides a safe space for each family member to express their thoughts, feelings, and concerns without interruption or judgment.

Therapists skilled in family dynamics can facilitate productive conversations, help siblings improve their communication skills, and guide them towards understanding each other’s perspectives. By learning how to communicate effectively, adult family members can build a foundation of trust and mutual respect, paving the way for a reconnection.

Families can address unresolved childhood traumas

Childhood experiences, both positive and negative, can have a lasting impact on sibling and parental relationships. Lingering traumas or conflicts from the past can hinder adults from forming healthy connections to other adult family members.

A supportive environment allows adult family members to delve into their shared history and address unresolved traumas. With the guidance of a skilled virtual therapist, they can explore the emotions surrounding their past experiences, gain insight into the impact on their current dynamics, and work towards healing wounds that may have kept them apart.

Individuals can learning new coping mechanisms that help relationships grow.

Sometimes, adults may struggle with individual challenges, such as anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues, which can hinder their ability to maintain healthy relationships.

By participating in in convenient online therapy sessions together, family member can can develop a deeper understanding of each other’s struggles and offer support and encouragement. Additionally, therapists can teach them effective strategies for managing stress, conflict, and other emotional difficulties, enhancing their ability to reconnect on a deeper level.

Families can build shared goals and traditions

Adult family members sometime needs expert guidance in creating shared goals and traditions that can strengthen their bond. Through facilitated virtual therapy discussions, siblings can identify common interests, hobbies, or aspirations, and establish joint activities or rituals.

Whether it’s planning regular video calls, planning visits or embarking on shared project, siblings and parents can begin to foster a sense of belonging and closeness that has been missing and gradually rebuilding the connections they may have lost.

Is it time for you to reconnect and rebuild a relationship with an adult family member? By eliminating geographical barriers and utilizing a trusted therapist who is skilled with creating healthy therapy session online, you can begin to promote healing and connecting in your life.

Looking for a therapist licensed in multiple states for your family or sibling relationship? Lisa Rogers is a licensed therapist for the following state: NY, NJ, TX, CA, FL, GA, IL, VT. Contact Lisa Rogers for more information.

Here are five ways ways a therapist can help a divorced family with kids:

1. Provide emotional support: Divorce can be a traumatic event for both parents and children, and a therapist can provide a safe and supportive space for everyone to process their feelings and emotions. This can include helping parents and children to grieve the loss of their previous family structure, as well as addressing any feelings of guilt, anger or sadness that may arise.
   
   
2. Help parents communicate effectively: Divorce can often lead to increased conflict and communication breakdowns between parents, which can be detrimental to the well-being of the children. A therapist can teach parents effective communication skills and strategies for co-parenting, such as active listening and problem-solving. This can help parents to work together more effectively and provide a more stable and positive environment for the children.
   
   
3. Support children through the transition: Children can often feel confused and conflicted during a divorce, as they may feel torn between their parents or experience feelings of loss and abandonment. A therapist can provide children with a safe and non-judgmental space to express their feelings, and help them to understand and cope with the changes in their family structure. This can include helping children to adjust to living in two separate homes (or states), as well as addressing any issues related to self-esteem or identity.
   
   
4. Address any underlying issues: Divorce can often be the result of underlying issues within the relationship, such as communication breakdowns, financial difficulties or infidelity. A therapist can work with the family to address these issues and help them to develop new coping mechanisms, so that they can move forward in a more positive and healthy way.
   
   
5. Help the family to develop a new normal: Divorce can be a difficult and painful process, but it can also be an opportunity for growth and change. A therapist can work with the family to help them to develop a new sense of normalcy, and to create a new and positive family dynamic. This can include helping parents and children to find new ways to spend time together and to build new family traditions.
   

It’s important to note that, a therapist can work with the families individually or in a group setting, depending on the specific needs of the family. And also it’s important to find a therapist who has experience working with families going through divorce, as they will have a better understanding of the unique challenges and dynamics that come with it.

Lastly, a multi-state licensed therapist like Lisa Rogers can be an invaluable resource for divorced families as they navigate co-parenting and relationships that reach across state lines. Utilizing virtual counseling for dispersed groups and families can be a convenient resource to help strengthen relationships that are physically distant. Learn more about virtual counseling here.

Some of these bumps you can fix yourself with some time and effort. But when you hit those big bumps, you may find it hard to resolve them yourselves, and that is when marriage counseling can help. 

Today, we’ll talk about the process of marriage counseling and its benefits, as well as how to get started.

What Is Marriage Counseling?

The goal of marriage (or couples) counseling is to improve the relationship of the couple, or in some cases, distinguish an impasse that cannot be crossed and discuss the possibility that it is time to move on. 

Is Marriage Counseling Effective?

Marriage counseling can be highly effective. The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) has expressed that marriage counseling is as effective, if not more effective than individual treatment for many different mental health issues, boasting an unprecedented 98% satisfaction rate among their clients.

With a combination of a qualified professional, both parties of the couple being committed to counseling, learning new skills, and having a safe environment to discuss sensitive issues, over time, couples may be able to:

• Create positive changes in their relationship dynamic
• Rekindle passion and romance that may have been lost
• Heal prior trauma and wounds
• Equip them to handle future issues

When both partners are invested in the treatment process, willing to take ownership in their part of the problem, and are willing to put forth the necessary effort outside of therapy, positive changes can occur in the relationship.

Is Marriage Counseling Right for Us?

Counseling may be right for you if both parties in the relationship are willing to engage and be committed to the therapy process. Having a good connection with your therapist is essential in becoming and staying engaged in therapy.

What Can We Expect During Marriage Counseling?

Each couple is different, so counseling is dependent on the therapist’s approach and the concerns presented by the couple. However, one thing that is the same across the board is that each person in the relationship should be made to feel that they are in a safe, accepting environment.

Partners may have different views of the problem at hand. A good therapist makes sure that each person feels heard and understood. This is accomplished by actively listening to each partner, summarizing and reflecting on each person’s experience, and stopping destructive communication patterns if they happen during a session.

How Long Does Marriage Counseling Take?

There is no right answer to this question. Your therapist may need a few sessions to assess the issues, and then, on average, couples require about 12 sessions. Remember, this number can vary based on several factors, including how willing the couple is to use the skills they learn in therapy in their day-to-day life, and is not an accurate estimate of the overall experience.

After the initial assessment, your therapist may be able to give you an idea of how long your counseling may take.

Is Online Marriage Counseling as Effective as In-Person Counseling?

Online counseling works the same as in-person therapy.

In 2008, researchers performed a meta-analysis of the effectiveness of online psychotherapeutic interventions and concluded that online therapy treats problems differently but is just as effective as in-person therapy.

If privacy is a concern, ask your therapist about the platform they use and its security. You have the right to privacy and the right to ensure that your privacy expectations can be met.

Let Lisa Rogers Counseling Help You Strengthen Your Marriage

Marriage counseling can help you address and move past significant issues in your relationship. And by working through these issues, you can strengthen the bond you have with your spouse. 

At Lisa Rogers Counseling, I can help you by acting as the intermediary. When we work together, you can learn new ways to speak to and hear your spouse, which will help you work through your issues without arguments and conflict.

I offer in-person therapy in New York City and virtual counseling  in NY, CA, IL, TX, NJ, VT, GA, FL, and Japan/International by-case basis. So contact me today, and let’s talk.

Modern marriage counseling and couples’ therapy has changed a great deal over the years. While the success rate was much lower in the past, today, marriage counseling contributes to happier and healthier couples. It’s the result of hard work, however. The counselor and both partners have to work together to achieve their shared desired goals. 

This may beg the question —  How exactly does all of this work? Today, we will take a look at marriage counseling and how it addresses conflicts and growth in marriage.

The First Marriage Counseling Session

Your first session with me, or any counselor, may be a little different than your others. You will likely need to do some preparation. Your therapist will provide some paperwork for you to fill out beforehand. They will inform you of their policies, ethics, and some legalities of your counselor-patient relationship. 

Once these things are clear, your therapist will begin therapy by asking you some questions. Typically, you will talk about why you are there. You may have one reason, or many reasons, to be attending therapy. 

Some couples seek therapy before marriage, called premarital counseling, to strengthen the base of their relationship, learn to handle disagreements in a healthy manner, and improve communication. Premarital counseling has demonstrated benefits, including lower divorce rates.

However, many couples seek counseling when significant issues arise that put their relationship or marriage in jeopardy. There are many possible reasons for this. Some of them include:

• Infidelity
• Growing Apart
• Unhealthy or No Communication
• Frequent Arguments
• Money Disagreements
• Sex Life Issues

Getting to Know Both of You

Like any new relationship, your therapist will spend the first few sessions getting to know both of you. Aside from learning the reasons you are there, to begin with, they may ask questions about your past, including details of your childhood, how you met, the start of your marriage, your family, your friends, and other aspects of your personal lives. 

Your therapist doesn’t just ask these questions to be nosy. It helps them get the whole picture. The more pieces of the story they can put together, the more able your counselor is to help you work toward addressing your issues and strengthening your relationship. 

In addition, sometimes, bringing up the past helps put things into perspective. 

Remember that your sessions are to be a safe space. It may be awkward to talk to a stranger at first, but through honesty and cooperation, you can learn to trust each other and build a relationship over time. You can be open and honest, express your emotions, and be yourself entirely. 

Setting Goals For Therapy

Your therapist will work with you to set some goals for what you want to achieve. They will talk about these things with you during the initial sessions. This process requires honesty and some thoughtfulness. Some goals can change as the therapy moves along. 

Some of these goals might include:

• Showing more affection
• Expressing more empathy
• Dealing with resentment and anger
• Surviving an affair
• To stop arguing as much

Your Best Days Are Ahead of You

Lisa Rogers Counseling is based in New York City. I am available for service via teletherapy in New York, California, Texas, Illinois, Vermont, Georgia, New Jersey, and Florida. I offer services in the following areas: 

• Adult Therapy: Individual, marriage, couples, group and family therapy
• Child Therapy: Individual, group therapy, family therapy, social skills, play therapy
• Adolescent Therapy: Individual therapy, group therapy, family therapy

If you are struggling, you don’t have to go through it alone. Contact my office today to schedule an appointment. 

But, how do you know if it’s the right time for marriage or relationship counseling? It can be tough to notice the signs when you get adjusted to certain things happening in the relationship. Here are a few ways to recognize when it may be time to bring in a counselor to help move through relationship problems.

1. WHEN NO ONE IS TALKING

If your daily pattern becomes the same: chatting about the kids, bills, or surface level things about your days, this could be a red flag that something is wrong. Sure, there may be days where this is the extent of conversation, but if this carries into weeks or months, it could be time to seek a therapist. Continuing simple conversation into a longer period of time often means neither one of you is looking to discuss a major issue that’s hanging over you.

This is where a marital therapist could help you. They can be the intermediary, ask questions and allow you to figure out the issue and get through it without arguments or strife. In speaking with a marriage counselor, they can assist in learning new ways to speak to and truly hear and understand your spouse. A third party could be what is needed to improve the quality of your conversations.

2. YOU NEVER FIGHT

One would think that if you and your spouse never argue that this is a good thing; nothing could be further from the truth. Every couple will have issues to move past, no matter how much you have in common. Even minor issues arise in every relationship that need to be addressed, and never having this could mean a much larger problem is near.

Never fighting could be the result of a myriad of issues: a parental example, not knowing how to begin a conversation, being concerned about confrontation, and other things could be why. Finding a good marital counselor can help discover the reasons and help work on ways to respectfully discuss problems when they arise.

3. WHEN YOUR SPOUSE BECOMES THE ENEMY

Over time, small issues can become larger ones, and you grow to resent your partner. They may have become the enemy in your eyes, where everything they do is a slight against you or they do something to purposely antagonize you. This is a big red flag that the marriage is heading in a bad direction.

When you see your spouse as against you and not supporting you, it can create a “me vs. you” scenario, and the collective relationship severely suffers. A marriage counselor is important in this case, where they can act as an outside observer who can discover the root issue and help remove the resentment.

4. A LIFE-CHANGING EVENT

A major life event, such as a death in the family, a major move, or an empty nest could create problems in any marriage. It’s a time where both spouses tend to react and re-assess most of the things in their lives, and the marriage may take a hit. Issues may come up where maybe there wasn’t one before, leading to larger problems, and larger fights.

Big life changes always become a time where people think about where they go next. Issues that result from this can be a good opportunity to bring in a marriage counselor, where they can learn why these questions are there and put both parties on a path to a positive, growing marriage.

These are only a few reasons why a couple may need to seek out marriage counseling. Finding a therapist that can address their needs well and calmly work out issues that have been plaguing spouses means the marriage continues a strong foundation and a lasting relationship. Through a marital therapist, the couple will learn techniques and strategies to help build a new foundation or build up what was already there to lead both spouses into a helpful, positive, and supportive marriage that will last a lifetime.

5. WHEN YOU’RE AT A CROSSROADS

If you and your spouse are at a crossroads in your relationship for these, or any other, problems, a counselor at Lisa Rogers Counseling will be happy to start you on the path to a better marriage.

At Lisa Rogers Counseling, we offer a wide range of therapy and mental health services for several areas. You are not alone in your struggle and neither are your loved ones. Reach out to us today to make an appointment.

Since 1993, I have been providing a combination of all my years of training tailoring specific treatments based on the individual needs and challenges of my patients, facilitating healing. I make every effort to accommodate the busy schedules of my patients by offering evenings, weekend appointments and Telemental Health (Online Counseling-Virtual/Video Conference and Phone Sessions) offered in the following states I am licensed in: New York, California, Illinois, Texas, New Jersey, Georgia, Florida, and Vermont.